from now on you will be known as ... wiggles

It's been an odd day. I often stay with a friend when I'm working b/c she lives much closer to my workplace, and this morning I woke up to find a couple of visitors crashed out in the living room, one of whom was a queer boy who'd brought a metric fuckload of wigs and diamond-encrusted watches and jewelry and stuff in order to do some kind of hijra-inspired performance at a wedding. Seriously, he woke up and was already in eyeliner, and I was all like, "shit, maybe i should put on some lip balm or something."

Then when I got home my dad, who is at that age where he peruses the obits in the Trinidad papers for names he knows, tells me the following:

DAD: Listen to this name: Elvis Chelsea Cambridge ...
ME [wondering what the hell his point is]: uh.
DAD [enjoying the lead-up]: ... better known as "Cornbread".

That's Trinidadians in a nutshell for you. It'll be your obituary before your friends realize that your name is not actually Cornbread.

In between all of this I found a Japanese cat eating corn.