relax! it's just a simulation!

[bossymarmalade]

...not that I'm pissed, but I wanted to use the splenderrific icon batgrrl1975 made. Oh, no, wait--I have a performance review tomorrow, which means I won't sleep much tonight. Blick. That's reason enough to use the icon.

And, since that crazy witch-lady yesterday threw me off, today there are two funny bits o' Chris.

Harem, by lesasoja

"If you had a harem, they'd be bustin' out of the seraglio within a week. You couldn't keep 'em in line if you tried with both hands. Now Lance," Chris went on, raising his voice above Justin's indignant yelp, "Lance could have a harem. He'd just, like, raise an eyebrow, and they'd slink in, and slink back out, and wait all breathless-like till the next time he called them."

Lance didn't look up from his Palm, but he was smiling. Justin eyed Lance curiously.

"Maybe he does have a harem," Chris mused. "Maybe Joey does the dance of the seven veils for him every night in his bunk. I bet he keeps the veils in that red duffel bag of his. Hey, Joey! You bring your veils this trip?"

and

Mighty Brite Bright by popfantastic

JC forgot to turn off the alarm on his cell phone, which was apparently set for 8 a.m.

"Fuck," Chris said.

"Oh, bother," JC said, silencing the beep. "Apologies for the unnecessary reveille, completely my -- what are you doing?"

Chris thought it was fairly obvious: he was crawling around naked on the floor. "I'm crawling around on the floor."

"Yes, but why?"

He overturned a stack of paperback novels, several of which were noticeably untranslated from their various original not-English languages. "I'm sure it's somewhere here --"

"Your clothes are still --"

"-- I feel that's fair. I mean, you fuck me, I get to throw out your new word-a-day calendar. That's even exchange, right? Don't look at me like that."

"Like what?"

"Like 'Ah, Christopher, so witty, so beguiling.' Yes, that."

Comments

[minette.livejournal.com]

Having busted something very important reading those lovely bits, I must now go read both stories in their entirety.

This is how I will be sucked into the popslash fandom: one brilliant Chris moment to the next. Goddamn it.

[minette.livejournal.com]

Also, good luck with your performance review!

[bossymarmalade.livejournal.com]

Thank you! And yes, Chris is addictive. Feel the *nslash!!! *wiggles fingers*

[indirajames.livejournal.com]

"Like 'Ah, Christopher, so witty, so beguiling.' Yes, that."

Bwahahahaha! *breaks something*

Also, good luck! I'll burn a tiny executive in effigy for you.

[shutyourface.livejournal.com]

Um...You have the wrong Lesa linked. There's two of us. I don't think Soja has a livejournal. Or if she does, I don't know her username. It was very surprising. I was like, 'When did I write this story?' Good times, though.

[bossymarmalade.livejournal.com]

*smacks forehead* D'oh! That'll teach me to whip through an update while I'm doing other stuff. Sorry about the mixup, honey, and thanks for pointing it out. *snug*

Re:

[shutyourface.livejournal.com]

It's ok. It was good for a giggle.