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bossymarmalade) wrote2004-01-08 09:51 am
bossymarmalade) wrote2004-01-08 09:51 am
Entry tags:
take my hand with your glove of love
Apart from my anger at there being no Gilmore Girls last night (do you Americans have new episodes right now? We haven't had any for at least two months!), I am somewhat conflicted by the events in the Orange County,
Okay, opening scene? Adorable. But how much does Hailey eat, that she's consumed ALL off the bagels and orange juice that a family of four would require? Good Lord. But I do love Sandy's ability to seem friendly even when he's insulting somebody; I guess that's where Seth gets it from.
Annoyance #1: Why is Kirsten so passive about stupid Hailey being stupid and disrupting her family? I get that she wants to spend time with her sister and keep an eye on her, but really. Not even being able to tell her to stop eating everything that's not nailed down or on fire? That doesn't seem like Kirsten to me.
Anyhow, Ryan's getting ready for school and Seth flies into the poolhouse, like he usually does, and meeps about the lack of Ryan/Seth time lately, and I want to hug him because I FEEL THE SAME WAY. After getting all those wonderful OC episodes that I missed from the delectable![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
uhmidont, I have noticed what an incredible lack of Ryan/Seth time there is lately. And like Seth, I lay the blame solely at the feet of The Thing.
Speaking of which, Seth is in the middle of asking Ryan for advice about his lady troubles (namely, telling Summer that he and Anna are now going out) when Marissa bounds insanely into the poolhouse and drapes herself on Ryan like a cheap skinny mink. Which, okay, she didn't know they were having a heart-to-heart -- but then she demands to know what they were doing, and when Seth demurs that they were talking, she wants to know what about! What the hell, bitch? They both LIVE there! They can do what they want in their own house! Seth being in the poolhouse shouldn't require an explanation! Arrrrrrgh!!
Anyhow, she fritters off somewhere and Ryan promises to spend quality time with Seth that afternoon. Yeah, Ryan promises a lot of things; I'm pretty sure this one will get fucked up somehow. Seth makes fun of Ryan's whipped state, but his jokes about Ryan forgetting his balls are hollow and miserable.
From there, we go to Sandy trying to help Jimmy write a resume. Jimmy made his own company straight out of high school, apparently (??) and so has no other experience. Sandy offers to fudge Jimmy's childhood lawn-mowing into "landscaping" experience, har har har. Jimmy whines that he doesn't even have any references, and Sandy ham-fistedly says, "whubbout your clients?" apparently forgetting that Jimmy's raison d'etre is to be the BIG FAILURE who lost all his clients' money.
Annoyance #2: I know they have to reiterate What Jimmy Did for the sake of new viewers, but Sandy the lawyer forgetting like that is just unrealistic and dumb. Now if Sandy had been pretending to forget for the sake of mocking Jimmy, that would be different; but that's really not in character for him and besides, Jimmy explains it all to Hailey in the rest of the scene! So, blah. Some sloppy writing there.
Speaking of which, Jimmy and Hailey deserve each other. I hope they get together and are lame together offscreen and away from the characters I actually want to spend time with.
Unfortunately, I instead get Ryan and Marissa co-depending down the hallway at school. Which brings me to --
Annoyance#3: What's with Ryan slinking around staring at Marissa with hopeful puppy-eyes? He can't even walk across the quad without her? No sir, I don't like it. But more importantly, I don't buy it. I could believe Ryan as the slightly obsessive, almost stalkerish boyfriend, but not this clingy whipped wuss. Dammit!
Such is my anger that I'm almost pleased when it cuts to a Seth/Anna scene. She's less annoying this episode, which is to say that her makeup is virulent and horrific as always, but there's less speech-impediment and no head-waggling. Anyhow, Anna tells Seth that if *he* lacks the wontons, *she'll* tell Summer that they're going out. I'm frankly kind of confused by this need to announce anything to Summer at all. In my day, when people in the same circle started going out with each other, you'd find out from your girlfriend in the group and then talk bad about the chick who landed your guy. There was none of this "telling"!
Anyhow, school happens and then it's over, and Ryan's wandering through the parking lot for no good reason when he happens upon Lurtz, who's standing by his pickup with the look of confusion that he does so well. I think it's the Cro-Magnon brow. Lurtz has a flat tire, and when Ryan gently inquires as to the cause Lurtz tells him it's been slashed. The ROID RAGE thatcallmesandy loves so dearly has receded or something, because he's really quite calm about it, almost puzzled. Ryan offers to help him change it (awwww!) and a couple of passing losers mock Lurtz for having a Big Gay Dad. Lurtz takes this in stride; he says that maybe it's his punishment for having been an asshole for so long. Awwww. I love him!
Ryan, confused perhaps by his new feelings for Lurtz or at a loss for what to do because Marissa is not within three feet of him and flashing her dead, dead eyes in his direction, tells Lurtz to forget the truck. Good idea!
Except not, because it cuts to Casa Del Cohen and Lurtz is happily playing some NFL game on the Playstation and Seth is whispering furiously to Ryan like they're a married couple and Ryan brought home some obnoxious drinking buddy on the night Seth planned for them to have a romantic dinner and maybe snuggle afterwards. Hee! Seth complains about Lurtz's using the PS2 for icky sports games, which I fully agree with, but Seth -- why was the NFL game there in the first place? Does Sandy of the ten thumbs like playing a little virtual gridiron in the morning? Somehow, I doubt it.
Ryan appeals to Seth's weakness for the underdog by telling him about Lurtz's tires; Seth relents, of course, and goes in to spend time with the big lunk. Meanwhile, Ryan gets a call from -- oh yes -- Shambles McBonesalot, who is currently eating Moroccan with Oliver in his penthouse. She says there's too much food. Pardon me while I laugh delicately into my sleeve for a moment.
Anyhow, after a disgusting moment where Oliver feeds her something and she acts like it's the worst torture she's ever endured, she wheedles for Ryan to come over and help them eat the food. I already know Chino's gonna punk out and go over there, but I'm pleasantly surprised when he takes his boyfriends with him. Hee! Lurtz and Seth curiously eating Moroccan food out of white takeout containers has to be the cutest thing ever.
They talk about vacations, and Paris, and Ryan feels all ghetto and left out because he's never been to Paris. Hell, he mentions tentatively that he'd like to see the Louvre someday and Oliver SMACKS him DOWN and tells him that the Louvre sucks. He then smarms on that he spends all his time in Switzerland anyhow; Lurtz perks up and asks about the snowboarding there, and sulkily says that the best he's ever gotten is Whistler. Watch it there, uruk-hai. That's my neighbourhood you're dissing; if it's good enough for La Timberlake, it's good enough for you, okay?
Since Rooney is the musical guest, one of their songs comes on the stereo and Bulemissa gushes over it, the way she gushes unconvincingly over everything ("I'm angry!"). Talk turns to the big Rooney concert the next night, which is sold out; Oliver, of course, reveals that he has the hookup and can get them all in. Lurtz and Ryan don't know who Rooney is, but that's okay because it's just a plot point. For some reason, we get a rather excessive number of reaction shots for Ryan this whole scene; it's not too painful because Ben McK conveys a lot with his face, but they're a little distracting.
Next morning, Seth stands blearily at the kitchen island and drinks coffee while Ryan eats scrambled eggs and toast and I smoosh into a puddle of goo. Some people are really gross when they eat, but Ryan eating eggs and toast is wonderful. Just the memory makes me want some right fucking NOW. Hailey wanders in and busts on them for a while, finding out that they're going to the Rooney concert (she's seen them already, yawn, shut up) and then mocking Ryan for letting Marissa go with Oliver. Her incessant nagging drives him away from his food, and for this I will never forgive her.
Coming back home from grocery shopping to replenish the roast boar and sixteen partridges that Hailey consumed as a midnight snack, Sandy asks if Kirsten's broached the subject of Hailey's unpleasantness and mooching with her sister. Kirsten says no, and my teeth grind. There are times when the whole parallel-theme thing they have going in this show just doesn't work; Seth chickening out about confronting Summer makes sense, Kirsten being afraid to confront her sister doesn't. But anyway, Sandy's eyebrows are beautiful and they discuss whether or not they should be concerned about this concert their babies are going to, which is great because if there's one thing this show does consistently right it's the level and tone of involvement that Sandy and Kirsten have in the kids' lives. Sandy says he'll run this "Roo...ney" up his proverbial flagpole (which is an odd thing to say but then Sandy says a lot of weird things) if Kirsten confronts Hailey. They take the groceries inside and they kiss and I love them more than any other television couple except Homer & Marge and Zoe & Wash.
Jimmy and Hailey come in, interrupting, and Hailey rather perplexingly referrs to Sandy and Kirsten as "whipped." WTF? Making out with your spouse in the kitchen means you're whipped? I think Hailey doesn't know what the hell she's talking about. But hey, she announces that she's gonna go out with Jimmy tonight, and Sandy and Kirsten perk up because they think this means they can have precious alone time together. Poor creatures. I think it's nice that they're so optimistic. My dream of a passionate Sandy/Kirsten love scene may happen someday, but I can tell already that it won't be in this episode.
Seth's all busy getting ready for his big concert and Sandy comes in to make sure he'll be all right. It's so completely sweet, because Sandy's all, "will there be people doing drugs there?" and Seth goes, "well, yeah, I hope so, otherwise it'll be a pretty lame concert," and Sandy doggedly asks, "will any of those people be you?" and I love them both. Because no, of course it won't be Seth, he has enough on his mind what with the Anna/Summer situation. He babbles for a while about maybe not telling Summer, and Sandy tells him that he's man enough to be in a relationship, he's man enough to go to a concert by himself, then he's man enough to do the honourable thing and tell her. Then he smooths down Seth's hair and I swear my heart fucking explodes from the adorableness of it all, because both Peter Gallagher and Adam Brody are so natural with each other that they really do seem like father and son, especially when Seth irritatedly re-rumples the section of hair that Sandy smoothed. God I love them.
The children natter off, and Kirsten and Sandy embrace and hold hands and debate taking a dip in the hot tub to get their evening started -- but of course, Jimmy and Hailey are there. With pizza. And Operation. It turns out, they decided to just stay home (meaning, the *Cohen* home) to recreate the days when Jimmy used to babysit Hailey. eeeeeiw, eeeiw eeeiw! There's so much eiw there I don't even know what to do with myself. Sandy seems like he's going to decline joining in the festivities, but Kirsten wussily gives in and my bile boils.
The kiddies are at the concert, which looks to be at some sort of club; the girl at the front door doesn't know who Oliver is, and he hasn't shown up yet to give them their tickets, so they're stuck waiting. Summer shows up too, and they bop awkwardly about before deciding to leave. On the way out, Oliver in his pink shirt accosts them and leads them around to the back door. Oliver sucks. He reminds me of this guy I was friends with in high school with who could schmooze his way into anything and was a born glad-hander, and this one time we were all sitting drunk in my friend's kiddie pool and I saw his penis, but that's a different story. My point is, Oliver sucks and I wouldn't want to see his penis in a kiddie pool either.
They hang around backstage and Oliver inexplicably hands Lurtz a guitar, thus setting the stage for my absolute favourite part of this entire episode: Lurtz expresses great delight, announces that he's written a couple of songs, and then starts strumming and SINGING. omg he's so cute! I love him now. True, his characterization is completely inconsistent, but whatever. It doesn't make too much of a difference because he's such a side character.
The concert starts, the kids are inside, and there's a lot of footage of this famous Rooney. Frankly, they seem like every other pseudo-70's thrift-store grungy band that's out there right now, but whatever. There's yet more wussing out by Seth about telling Summer and more annoyance from Ryan about Oliver & Marissa being so cosy. Incidentally, Skinny's "enjoyment" of the music is apparently all telegraphed by her standing awkwardly shoved next to Oliver, bobbing inconsistently and periodically turning her head to gape her open-mouthed grin at him. *shudder*
Summer and Anna head to the bathroom together, and Anna signals to Seth that she's going to get the job done. But for some reason, while she's applying lipstick Summer feels the need to break into song. Her repertoire? The Golden Girls theme. This is just weird. I mean, Hailey was babbling about the GG earlier, but this is odd. Anna, naturally, knows the theme and loves the show; she claims to be Rose and Summer announces that she's Blanche. What the fuck EVER! There's no way Anna's like Rose; Anna's not like anybody from GG. Maybe one of those "saucy" old ladies who Sophia was always having fights with, but certainly not Rose. Summer as Blanche, that's fine. I guess there's not much range when your character description is "slut."
Back at the homestead, Sandy and Kirsten are ready to call it a night. Hailey, classy lady that she is, takes this opportunity to start mocking Kirsten's livelihood; Sandy finally loses it in his polite Jewish way and berates her for being cruel to her sister, since Kirsten's the only reason that anybody in the house puts up with Hailey in the first place. And here I notice that Peter Gallagher really does pronounce it "Keeeesten", like I thought he said in the pilot. Huh. Anyhow, Hailey pitches a fit and flounces off to her room. Good riddance.
Ryan's having no fun at the concert, which makes sense because he's so stressed out about Oliver and Marissa and, hmmm, probably because he's not really into music and doesn't have an opinion about Rooney one way or another. For all Marissa's talk about wanting to make her boyfriend's first concert a good one, she's sure let him down. Eventually, the boy finds Ollie & Bones and drags her away to some stairwell so they can make out. He doesn't know why she likes Oliver so much, anyhow; Marissa drones that she can talk to him about the crazy in her head and ends up intimating that if Ryan isn't having any fun, she won't miss him. Hurt, Ryan tosses his hair and runs off, hoping his mascara is waterproof.
Since we saw Oliver make a Very Suspicious phone call earlier, it's really no surprise to find him being busted by an undercover narcotics officer outside. Ryan, seeing a chance for free karma points, darts back inside to beg Seth's phone and car keys from him so he can go to Oliver's rescue. Seth complies, of course, and collects three Mountain Dews from the bar where he's standing. As soon as he turns around, Rooney ends their set and thanks the crowd; Seth's face falls and I am confused. I'm even more confused when Anna runs up and starts telling him what the group sang, because the concert is in a CLUB and there's no possible way that Seth, standing at the bar, could miss hearing the music. Anyway, they talk hysterically about who should tell Summer, only to look up and have Summer say, "tell me what?" uhhh-oh.
They sit Summer down on a sofa and tell her; Summer, busily and adorably eating a carrot stick, is nonchalant. They can still be friends! she says. They can still hang out! This is all very suspicious, because Summer doesn't really "hang out" with them. I agree withcallmesandy's theory that Summer's going to hang out with Seth and Anna until they break up, muahhahahha! Summer deserves Seth, because she had cute glittery heart earrings and Anna's makeup made me want to choke the local Avon lady to death.
At the house, Kirsten is agitated. Sandy is sanguine, despite the fact that Hailey is sticking to her spoiled brat behaviour and has locked herself in her room. Kirsten doesn't like it, because for all they know, Hailey is packing and will disappear by the morning, and she would rather put up with her loser sister than have her out here unsafe in the big world. But that will have to wait, becaue Ryan calls Sandy with a plea for legal representation, and off Sandy goes to get Oliver out of his mess.
Sandy and Ryan sit around at the cop shop and Sandy tells Ryan that Ollie was trying to buy coke, and that his parents are gone for a month and just left Oliver to his own devices. "I just can't understand that kind of thing," Sandy shakes his head, and Ryan quietly says, well, good. They're so darling together, and Sandy really is *so* horrified that parents could abandon their children, and Ryan's so needy when it comes to hearing that kind of assurance -- oh, breaks the heart. Anyhow, Oliver comes out and wants to know why Ryan would go to these lengths; instead of confessing that he only did it in the hope that Marissa will someday let him touch her goods, Ryan says...something. Really, I don't remember, because whatever he said, I didn't believe him.
Excitement over, Sandy returns home and finds himself a bagel. Hailey comes in and tries to steal half of it like the lameass mooch she is; Sandy hoards the bagel and slathers cream cheese all over both halves. Hailey tells him that what he said to her was true, and she has to smarten up; Sandy preaches to her for a while but I honestly have no idea what he was saying because at some point, he starts eating half of the bagel and it looks SO GOOD I want one right NOW!!! arrrrgh!!! He ends up giving her half and he's so sweet about it and she's so grateful that I don't even begrudge her the delicious delicious bagel.
Marissa slides into the poolhouse and straight onto Ryan on the bed; it's all pretty hideous, like that movie Anaconda. Oliver 'fessed up to her, so she knows what went down; however, for once she doesn't want to talk about herself or Oliver and starts kissing Ryan. I don't know which is worse.
The other four bumble in, and yes, Lurtz is strangely unaffected by the sight of his ex-girlfriend and instigator of much ROID RAGE kissing the other reason for the aforementioned RR. I can only assume he is in a gentler, kinder headspace, one where he wants to hang out with geeks and play video games. Because that's what they all end up doing, and Summer sits in between Seth and Anna on the sofa, and Lurtz kicks Seth's ass at the game. So sad. They all end in a cute little pile across the sofa and chairs, switching seats for the PS2, and my only complaint at this point is that Anna isn't playing. wtf, girl? If you're gonna pretend to be a geek and erroneously call all comics "graphic novels", you should be playing video games, too.
They tumble happily about like puppies, and then the camera pulls out to show Oliver LURKING outside Casa Del Cohen. Uhhhhh...okay? That was really uncessary. We got enough of an idea how much of a friendless boob Oliver is just by looking at the guy and listening to his annoying smartass voice for ten seconds; we don't need him staring wistfully into the window of the Cohen house at night. Still in his pink shirt! I can't wait till he starts flipping his shit like the preview for the next ep suggested!
Okay, opening scene? Adorable. But how much does Hailey eat, that she's consumed ALL off the bagels and orange juice that a family of four would require? Good Lord. But I do love Sandy's ability to seem friendly even when he's insulting somebody; I guess that's where Seth gets it from.
Annoyance #1: Why is Kirsten so passive about stupid Hailey being stupid and disrupting her family? I get that she wants to spend time with her sister and keep an eye on her, but really. Not even being able to tell her to stop eating everything that's not nailed down or on fire? That doesn't seem like Kirsten to me.
Anyhow, Ryan's getting ready for school and Seth flies into the poolhouse, like he usually does, and meeps about the lack of Ryan/Seth time lately, and I want to hug him because I FEEL THE SAME WAY. After getting all those wonderful OC episodes that I missed from the delectable
uhmidont, I have noticed what an incredible lack of Ryan/Seth time there is lately. And like Seth, I lay the blame solely at the feet of The Thing. Speaking of which, Seth is in the middle of asking Ryan for advice about his lady troubles (namely, telling Summer that he and Anna are now going out) when Marissa bounds insanely into the poolhouse and drapes herself on Ryan like a cheap skinny mink. Which, okay, she didn't know they were having a heart-to-heart -- but then she demands to know what they were doing, and when Seth demurs that they were talking, she wants to know what about! What the hell, bitch? They both LIVE there! They can do what they want in their own house! Seth being in the poolhouse shouldn't require an explanation! Arrrrrrgh!!
Anyhow, she fritters off somewhere and Ryan promises to spend quality time with Seth that afternoon. Yeah, Ryan promises a lot of things; I'm pretty sure this one will get fucked up somehow. Seth makes fun of Ryan's whipped state, but his jokes about Ryan forgetting his balls are hollow and miserable.
From there, we go to Sandy trying to help Jimmy write a resume. Jimmy made his own company straight out of high school, apparently (??) and so has no other experience. Sandy offers to fudge Jimmy's childhood lawn-mowing into "landscaping" experience, har har har. Jimmy whines that he doesn't even have any references, and Sandy ham-fistedly says, "whubbout your clients?" apparently forgetting that Jimmy's raison d'etre is to be the BIG FAILURE who lost all his clients' money.
Annoyance #2: I know they have to reiterate What Jimmy Did for the sake of new viewers, but Sandy the lawyer forgetting like that is just unrealistic and dumb. Now if Sandy had been pretending to forget for the sake of mocking Jimmy, that would be different; but that's really not in character for him and besides, Jimmy explains it all to Hailey in the rest of the scene! So, blah. Some sloppy writing there.
Speaking of which, Jimmy and Hailey deserve each other. I hope they get together and are lame together offscreen and away from the characters I actually want to spend time with.
Unfortunately, I instead get Ryan and Marissa co-depending down the hallway at school. Which brings me to --
Annoyance#3: What's with Ryan slinking around staring at Marissa with hopeful puppy-eyes? He can't even walk across the quad without her? No sir, I don't like it. But more importantly, I don't buy it. I could believe Ryan as the slightly obsessive, almost stalkerish boyfriend, but not this clingy whipped wuss. Dammit!
Such is my anger that I'm almost pleased when it cuts to a Seth/Anna scene. She's less annoying this episode, which is to say that her makeup is virulent and horrific as always, but there's less speech-impediment and no head-waggling. Anyhow, Anna tells Seth that if *he* lacks the wontons, *she'll* tell Summer that they're going out. I'm frankly kind of confused by this need to announce anything to Summer at all. In my day, when people in the same circle started going out with each other, you'd find out from your girlfriend in the group and then talk bad about the chick who landed your guy. There was none of this "telling"!
Anyhow, school happens and then it's over, and Ryan's wandering through the parking lot for no good reason when he happens upon Lurtz, who's standing by his pickup with the look of confusion that he does so well. I think it's the Cro-Magnon brow. Lurtz has a flat tire, and when Ryan gently inquires as to the cause Lurtz tells him it's been slashed. The ROID RAGE that
callmesandy loves so dearly has receded or something, because he's really quite calm about it, almost puzzled. Ryan offers to help him change it (awwww!) and a couple of passing losers mock Lurtz for having a Big Gay Dad. Lurtz takes this in stride; he says that maybe it's his punishment for having been an asshole for so long. Awwww. I love him! Ryan, confused perhaps by his new feelings for Lurtz or at a loss for what to do because Marissa is not within three feet of him and flashing her dead, dead eyes in his direction, tells Lurtz to forget the truck. Good idea!
Except not, because it cuts to Casa Del Cohen and Lurtz is happily playing some NFL game on the Playstation and Seth is whispering furiously to Ryan like they're a married couple and Ryan brought home some obnoxious drinking buddy on the night Seth planned for them to have a romantic dinner and maybe snuggle afterwards. Hee! Seth complains about Lurtz's using the PS2 for icky sports games, which I fully agree with, but Seth -- why was the NFL game there in the first place? Does Sandy of the ten thumbs like playing a little virtual gridiron in the morning? Somehow, I doubt it.
Ryan appeals to Seth's weakness for the underdog by telling him about Lurtz's tires; Seth relents, of course, and goes in to spend time with the big lunk. Meanwhile, Ryan gets a call from -- oh yes -- Shambles McBonesalot, who is currently eating Moroccan with Oliver in his penthouse. She says there's too much food. Pardon me while I laugh delicately into my sleeve for a moment.
Anyhow, after a disgusting moment where Oliver feeds her something and she acts like it's the worst torture she's ever endured, she wheedles for Ryan to come over and help them eat the food. I already know Chino's gonna punk out and go over there, but I'm pleasantly surprised when he takes his boyfriends with him. Hee! Lurtz and Seth curiously eating Moroccan food out of white takeout containers has to be the cutest thing ever.
They talk about vacations, and Paris, and Ryan feels all ghetto and left out because he's never been to Paris. Hell, he mentions tentatively that he'd like to see the Louvre someday and Oliver SMACKS him DOWN and tells him that the Louvre sucks. He then smarms on that he spends all his time in Switzerland anyhow; Lurtz perks up and asks about the snowboarding there, and sulkily says that the best he's ever gotten is Whistler. Watch it there, uruk-hai. That's my neighbourhood you're dissing; if it's good enough for La Timberlake, it's good enough for you, okay?
Since Rooney is the musical guest, one of their songs comes on the stereo and Bulemissa gushes over it, the way she gushes unconvincingly over everything ("I'm angry!"). Talk turns to the big Rooney concert the next night, which is sold out; Oliver, of course, reveals that he has the hookup and can get them all in. Lurtz and Ryan don't know who Rooney is, but that's okay because it's just a plot point. For some reason, we get a rather excessive number of reaction shots for Ryan this whole scene; it's not too painful because Ben McK conveys a lot with his face, but they're a little distracting.
Next morning, Seth stands blearily at the kitchen island and drinks coffee while Ryan eats scrambled eggs and toast and I smoosh into a puddle of goo. Some people are really gross when they eat, but Ryan eating eggs and toast is wonderful. Just the memory makes me want some right fucking NOW. Hailey wanders in and busts on them for a while, finding out that they're going to the Rooney concert (she's seen them already, yawn, shut up) and then mocking Ryan for letting Marissa go with Oliver. Her incessant nagging drives him away from his food, and for this I will never forgive her.
Coming back home from grocery shopping to replenish the roast boar and sixteen partridges that Hailey consumed as a midnight snack, Sandy asks if Kirsten's broached the subject of Hailey's unpleasantness and mooching with her sister. Kirsten says no, and my teeth grind. There are times when the whole parallel-theme thing they have going in this show just doesn't work; Seth chickening out about confronting Summer makes sense, Kirsten being afraid to confront her sister doesn't. But anyway, Sandy's eyebrows are beautiful and they discuss whether or not they should be concerned about this concert their babies are going to, which is great because if there's one thing this show does consistently right it's the level and tone of involvement that Sandy and Kirsten have in the kids' lives. Sandy says he'll run this "Roo...ney" up his proverbial flagpole (which is an odd thing to say but then Sandy says a lot of weird things) if Kirsten confronts Hailey. They take the groceries inside and they kiss and I love them more than any other television couple except Homer & Marge and Zoe & Wash.
Jimmy and Hailey come in, interrupting, and Hailey rather perplexingly referrs to Sandy and Kirsten as "whipped." WTF? Making out with your spouse in the kitchen means you're whipped? I think Hailey doesn't know what the hell she's talking about. But hey, she announces that she's gonna go out with Jimmy tonight, and Sandy and Kirsten perk up because they think this means they can have precious alone time together. Poor creatures. I think it's nice that they're so optimistic. My dream of a passionate Sandy/Kirsten love scene may happen someday, but I can tell already that it won't be in this episode.
Seth's all busy getting ready for his big concert and Sandy comes in to make sure he'll be all right. It's so completely sweet, because Sandy's all, "will there be people doing drugs there?" and Seth goes, "well, yeah, I hope so, otherwise it'll be a pretty lame concert," and Sandy doggedly asks, "will any of those people be you?" and I love them both. Because no, of course it won't be Seth, he has enough on his mind what with the Anna/Summer situation. He babbles for a while about maybe not telling Summer, and Sandy tells him that he's man enough to be in a relationship, he's man enough to go to a concert by himself, then he's man enough to do the honourable thing and tell her. Then he smooths down Seth's hair and I swear my heart fucking explodes from the adorableness of it all, because both Peter Gallagher and Adam Brody are so natural with each other that they really do seem like father and son, especially when Seth irritatedly re-rumples the section of hair that Sandy smoothed. God I love them.
The children natter off, and Kirsten and Sandy embrace and hold hands and debate taking a dip in the hot tub to get their evening started -- but of course, Jimmy and Hailey are there. With pizza. And Operation. It turns out, they decided to just stay home (meaning, the *Cohen* home) to recreate the days when Jimmy used to babysit Hailey. eeeeeiw, eeeiw eeeiw! There's so much eiw there I don't even know what to do with myself. Sandy seems like he's going to decline joining in the festivities, but Kirsten wussily gives in and my bile boils.
The kiddies are at the concert, which looks to be at some sort of club; the girl at the front door doesn't know who Oliver is, and he hasn't shown up yet to give them their tickets, so they're stuck waiting. Summer shows up too, and they bop awkwardly about before deciding to leave. On the way out, Oliver in his pink shirt accosts them and leads them around to the back door. Oliver sucks. He reminds me of this guy I was friends with in high school with who could schmooze his way into anything and was a born glad-hander, and this one time we were all sitting drunk in my friend's kiddie pool and I saw his penis, but that's a different story. My point is, Oliver sucks and I wouldn't want to see his penis in a kiddie pool either.
They hang around backstage and Oliver inexplicably hands Lurtz a guitar, thus setting the stage for my absolute favourite part of this entire episode: Lurtz expresses great delight, announces that he's written a couple of songs, and then starts strumming and SINGING. omg he's so cute! I love him now. True, his characterization is completely inconsistent, but whatever. It doesn't make too much of a difference because he's such a side character.
The concert starts, the kids are inside, and there's a lot of footage of this famous Rooney. Frankly, they seem like every other pseudo-70's thrift-store grungy band that's out there right now, but whatever. There's yet more wussing out by Seth about telling Summer and more annoyance from Ryan about Oliver & Marissa being so cosy. Incidentally, Skinny's "enjoyment" of the music is apparently all telegraphed by her standing awkwardly shoved next to Oliver, bobbing inconsistently and periodically turning her head to gape her open-mouthed grin at him. *shudder*
Summer and Anna head to the bathroom together, and Anna signals to Seth that she's going to get the job done. But for some reason, while she's applying lipstick Summer feels the need to break into song. Her repertoire? The Golden Girls theme. This is just weird. I mean, Hailey was babbling about the GG earlier, but this is odd. Anna, naturally, knows the theme and loves the show; she claims to be Rose and Summer announces that she's Blanche. What the fuck EVER! There's no way Anna's like Rose; Anna's not like anybody from GG. Maybe one of those "saucy" old ladies who Sophia was always having fights with, but certainly not Rose. Summer as Blanche, that's fine. I guess there's not much range when your character description is "slut."
Back at the homestead, Sandy and Kirsten are ready to call it a night. Hailey, classy lady that she is, takes this opportunity to start mocking Kirsten's livelihood; Sandy finally loses it in his polite Jewish way and berates her for being cruel to her sister, since Kirsten's the only reason that anybody in the house puts up with Hailey in the first place. And here I notice that Peter Gallagher really does pronounce it "Keeeesten", like I thought he said in the pilot. Huh. Anyhow, Hailey pitches a fit and flounces off to her room. Good riddance.
Ryan's having no fun at the concert, which makes sense because he's so stressed out about Oliver and Marissa and, hmmm, probably because he's not really into music and doesn't have an opinion about Rooney one way or another. For all Marissa's talk about wanting to make her boyfriend's first concert a good one, she's sure let him down. Eventually, the boy finds Ollie & Bones and drags her away to some stairwell so they can make out. He doesn't know why she likes Oliver so much, anyhow; Marissa drones that she can talk to him about the crazy in her head and ends up intimating that if Ryan isn't having any fun, she won't miss him. Hurt, Ryan tosses his hair and runs off, hoping his mascara is waterproof.
Since we saw Oliver make a Very Suspicious phone call earlier, it's really no surprise to find him being busted by an undercover narcotics officer outside. Ryan, seeing a chance for free karma points, darts back inside to beg Seth's phone and car keys from him so he can go to Oliver's rescue. Seth complies, of course, and collects three Mountain Dews from the bar where he's standing. As soon as he turns around, Rooney ends their set and thanks the crowd; Seth's face falls and I am confused. I'm even more confused when Anna runs up and starts telling him what the group sang, because the concert is in a CLUB and there's no possible way that Seth, standing at the bar, could miss hearing the music. Anyway, they talk hysterically about who should tell Summer, only to look up and have Summer say, "tell me what?" uhhh-oh.
They sit Summer down on a sofa and tell her; Summer, busily and adorably eating a carrot stick, is nonchalant. They can still be friends! she says. They can still hang out! This is all very suspicious, because Summer doesn't really "hang out" with them. I agree with
callmesandy's theory that Summer's going to hang out with Seth and Anna until they break up, muahhahahha! Summer deserves Seth, because she had cute glittery heart earrings and Anna's makeup made me want to choke the local Avon lady to death.At the house, Kirsten is agitated. Sandy is sanguine, despite the fact that Hailey is sticking to her spoiled brat behaviour and has locked herself in her room. Kirsten doesn't like it, because for all they know, Hailey is packing and will disappear by the morning, and she would rather put up with her loser sister than have her out here unsafe in the big world. But that will have to wait, becaue Ryan calls Sandy with a plea for legal representation, and off Sandy goes to get Oliver out of his mess.
Sandy and Ryan sit around at the cop shop and Sandy tells Ryan that Ollie was trying to buy coke, and that his parents are gone for a month and just left Oliver to his own devices. "I just can't understand that kind of thing," Sandy shakes his head, and Ryan quietly says, well, good. They're so darling together, and Sandy really is *so* horrified that parents could abandon their children, and Ryan's so needy when it comes to hearing that kind of assurance -- oh, breaks the heart. Anyhow, Oliver comes out and wants to know why Ryan would go to these lengths; instead of confessing that he only did it in the hope that Marissa will someday let him touch her goods, Ryan says...something. Really, I don't remember, because whatever he said, I didn't believe him.
Excitement over, Sandy returns home and finds himself a bagel. Hailey comes in and tries to steal half of it like the lameass mooch she is; Sandy hoards the bagel and slathers cream cheese all over both halves. Hailey tells him that what he said to her was true, and she has to smarten up; Sandy preaches to her for a while but I honestly have no idea what he was saying because at some point, he starts eating half of the bagel and it looks SO GOOD I want one right NOW!!! arrrrgh!!! He ends up giving her half and he's so sweet about it and she's so grateful that I don't even begrudge her the delicious delicious bagel.
Marissa slides into the poolhouse and straight onto Ryan on the bed; it's all pretty hideous, like that movie Anaconda. Oliver 'fessed up to her, so she knows what went down; however, for once she doesn't want to talk about herself or Oliver and starts kissing Ryan. I don't know which is worse.
The other four bumble in, and yes, Lurtz is strangely unaffected by the sight of his ex-girlfriend and instigator of much ROID RAGE kissing the other reason for the aforementioned RR. I can only assume he is in a gentler, kinder headspace, one where he wants to hang out with geeks and play video games. Because that's what they all end up doing, and Summer sits in between Seth and Anna on the sofa, and Lurtz kicks Seth's ass at the game. So sad. They all end in a cute little pile across the sofa and chairs, switching seats for the PS2, and my only complaint at this point is that Anna isn't playing. wtf, girl? If you're gonna pretend to be a geek and erroneously call all comics "graphic novels", you should be playing video games, too.
They tumble happily about like puppies, and then the camera pulls out to show Oliver LURKING outside Casa Del Cohen. Uhhhhh...okay? That was really uncessary. We got enough of an idea how much of a friendless boob Oliver is just by looking at the guy and listening to his annoying smartass voice for ten seconds; we don't need him staring wistfully into the window of the Cohen house at night. Still in his pink shirt! I can't wait till he starts flipping his shit like the preview for the next ep suggested!
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And yes, yes, was not every one of Sandy's scenes wonderful? Esp. his smackdowns and parenting moments, and the one with Ryan was the best.
Also yes: I do not believe Ryan would be that whipped. Do. Not. Believe. I went with the flow, and Ben McK almost convinced me, but no, not quite. He luuuuuuurves her, but as of what, one, two weeks ago he had enough of a brain to skip the stupid party and now he's surgically attached to her? It's nutty. I think a case of sacrificing the character for the comedy and they only barely pulled it off.
Bulessima! HEEEEEE! God, I hate Marissa. I've made it through so many fandoms and shows without hating the female lead who got in the way of the slashiness or what have you, and now, here I am undone. I hate Marissa. She's an awful actress in a way even I can notice.
In re: GG, no new eps since the Yale game one. Also, did you catch that "Dave" was supposed to show up for Xmas break? "Dave" has his own show, kiddies, he gets to breath more when talking, he's never coming BACK! Set Lane free!
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*tacklepouncesnug*
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*nibbles your throat*
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Sandy is so fantastic I can barely stand it. I love that they writers don't fall into that trap of trying to make him all "cool" and "hip"; he is what he is, and when he does make a little foray into what those crazy kids are saying and doing nowadays, it's always awkward and embarrassing in the most endearing way. Hee!
I think a case of sacrificing the character for the comedy and they only barely pulled it off.
Totally. I really think that if they went more with the posessive boyfriend thing than the codependent whipped thing, it would seem more *Ryan* to me.
She's an awful actress in a way even I can notice.
I give a lot of leeway as well -- there's even times when I watch Homicide and don't mind Ballard and Sheppard -- but Mischa Barton is on a level so far below them that she can't even look natural when all she's supposed to do is stand there and look like she's having fun. Her scenes at the concert? I've seen people look more involved and happy when they were standing at the bus stop, for fucksake.
Set Lane free!
Yes! Lane deserves a boyfriend, one up to par with the dear departed Dave! Master Brody really was so good on GG, I hated to see him go. Le sigh.
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Okay, I'm done rambling.
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Barton's scenes at the concert were awful. She was just smiling vacantly and standing there. My one cool moment from living near LA was getting to participate as an extra in one of those "club show" filmings and believe you me, even the lousy actors on Party of Five did it so much better. She's even gotten worse on the show, because she wasn't that bad in the pilot and second episode. But since then, it's like she's sleepwalking. She sucks.
And yeah, dependent Ryan? Right. Don't buy it. Even his dependent on Seth days (ie Best Episode Ever: The Outsider!!!!!!!!!!!!!) he wasn't that whipped. It seems out of character.
Oh, and someone on friendsfriends
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Or hit me up on IM when I get home, because I got the hook-ups, yo. Not that Maggie's link isn't faboo, but I know a few others (tragically all favorites on the home machine and not at work).
Also, I know someone who can get you the entire run on CD. Just sayin'.
Do I get points for making it through this entire comment without once saying 'dreamy' - or did I just ruin it?
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Also -- better than TWoP? I live for those words! Hee! And just for you, I have collected my previous halfassed OC reviews (all three of them) into a nice memory page (http://www.livejournal.com/tools/memories.bml?user=stubbleglitter&keyword=the+oc&filter=all). Actually, it's a good idea to have those memoried in any case, so thank you for the notion. *g*
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I love the Kirsten/Sandy/Seth/Ryan dynamic soooo much that I find myself resenting many of the other characters who come in and take up valuable screen time (unless it is a fleeting appearance that allows for amusing Cohen moments, like the four of them staring resentfully at Hailey as she consumes every breakfast food in the house. Or unless it's Summer.) Evidently, they could make episodes titled "The Cohens Clean Out The Garage", "The Cohens Order Pizza For A Night At Home; Seth And Sandy Do Commentary On Old Star Trek Episodes", or "Yard Work, The Cohen Way", and I would be as happy as a little Newport Beach clam.
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Also, your episode titles? I am madly in love with each one of them and all the images they conjure in my head. Because they're so easy to see! Like, for the Garage-Cleaning, Sandy would be all hearty let's-pitch-in-and-help and tell the boys to listen to what Kirsten says, and Kirsten would rally them around and wear big work-gloves and sort through things, and Seth would whine and complain but really he wouldn't mind but he'd get distracted easily, and Ryan would just pitch in and help and be all slightly dazed because it's family time and they're treating him like he belongs and eeee, eeeeeeee!!! Too darling to believe. They couldn't have cast the Cohens + their Very Special Atwood any more appealingly, man.
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That's all I have to say about that.
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That bit makes me laugh every. single. time. Priceless. Also, what is up with that Hailey chick? They established last night that she's 10 years younger than Jimmy and Keeersten, so doesn't that mean she's in her *thirties*? I mean, people in this socio-economic group don't seem like the type to start having kids while still in college, so aren't all the parents at least 40 (if not older). If I'm right, then Hailey is an even bigger loser than I originally thought.
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Anyhow, that puts Hailey as heading towards her thirties, which...makes her my age! And JC's. And a loser, still, because that pouty little-girl act? Pretty damn lame. Although I must admit that I also love Operation and the Golden Girls, but not the "blow" and "clean speed" that Hailey also seems so fond of. *g*
Seriously, have you ever seen somebody eat so awkwardly as Mischa Barton ate that dolmathes or whatever it was? She chowed down on the *lime slice* with more enthusiasm in the New Years' episode! *shudder*
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I really need to find some way to get this canon whoring to pay. In fic, at the very least. (Yes, Maggie, I am looking at YOU!)
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The casting of Cohens+Atwood in this show is truly one of those happy experiments in actor chemistry. Singly, they're all good, but together, they're approaching perfection.
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cheesy guilty pleasurethought-provoking drama. So Kirsten and Lady Heather (aka Julie) were both 22-ish when they had Seth and Marissa, respectively? That just seems so strange for couples getting together during the conservative Reagan years.I was in college in the '80s, and most of my friends are just getting around to marrying and having kids now. Almost everybody I went to school with who has kids, has pre-schoolers, not high-schoolers. Even the two mavericks who went out and got married right away are the parents of 13-year-olds. And if Sandy and Kirsten are close in age, then he was already a dad while still in law school. That just seems so unrealistic to me. Are we sure this isn't an Aaron Spelling show?